Halliebeth, it is one thing to understand on a cognitive level that you are being the "compliant child", but it doesn't necessarily help you to not be that way just because your T points this out. As you mentioned, you are "stuck" in the past motions of surviving and your way of coping is "ingrained in you." Deep work--getting at your feelings and their origins--might help you to move beyond these behaviors and become unstuck--but only if you want to and when you want to. It can take a while. Has T offered anything to you to help you address the past and get beyond being stuck?