Have Hope

I do think IM going to ask for a divorce. I don't think I can stay with someone I feel like I don't know or trust. I'm going to have to bide my time. I have to start therapy. I may need to see if I will be eligible for SSI since my anxiety makes if difficult to hold a job. I have a credit card in my own name I would like to get paid off or down before I file. We have some money coming in from his jog that could help us get back on our feet financially. I asked him flat out if he wanted to be done today,and he said I don't know...I dont think so. I feel like he doesnt think I will be the one to walk, but I think I am. Im with a strange right now. Im scared as hell but this is something I think i need to do when the time is right. Who knows...maybe he will pull the trigger and stop leading me on.

Lots of hugs to you and thanks for listening. I truly believe we will do the right things for ourselves