My goal is to end things very amicably. My goal is also complete self protection. I will tell him that I'd like to end this amicably and on good terms. I will fake everything if I have to, and will I bury the hatchet out of sheer necessity.

And the thing is..... I am not angry right now, nor am I enraged. I see that he has a disorder and that he is mentally and emotionally incapable of being in a healthy relationship with me. I don't feel sorry for him, but I see him for the damaged person he is. And I do think it's very sad. He has a LOT of personal trauma, of which he is not even aware. He has years of individual therapy ahead of him, IF he ever wants to get better and if he truly wants a healthy relationship. Otherwise, the pattern will just repeat itself again, and he will abuse the next woman too.

I have a new therapist with whom I will speak with on Thursday who is experienced in domestic abuse and in extricating oneself from a difficult relationship. I am looking forward to this call with him.