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Anyway, I guess the answer would be different for everyone. The more I think about it, my depression set in after my negative self image developed. I've noticed something interesting that happens once in a while to me. When someone I meet gets the chance to know me, reaches out their hand in friendship, and attempts to boost my confidence, my mood and the way I feel about myself will be so much more positive. All it takes though is some thought of self doubt over this to enter my mind and I'll be feeling sad in no time at all.
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Hi Isolated Guy,
The doctors often ask us, 'Has something happened to you recently'?' I think they have a theory that some of us get depressed because we have been knocked back by something and had some rejection. Against this, depression can sometimes set in for no apparent reason, and that is more difficult to explain.
It's complicated, but if you perk up when someone shows you some love, then that has to be a good sign.
Unfortunately some of us (including me) have been so down that nothing perks us up and that's when you have to go all the way to your bootstraps to find some strength. Somehow, when you finally give up hope of getting 'better' and yet realise that you are still here, that's when the self image can come back. I don't want to lead anyone on here, but I was right at the bottom, after many cycles down there, and I realised - "I can do this". I think it was my wife who helped. I was really down, and she said "You've been here before and you always get through it." I said, "But it's hard".
She said, "It's always been hard for you."
Yes, "It's always been hard for me, and I always get through it." That's worth holding on to, and IMHO there's some positive self image in there.
Maybe we have to take all that self doubt and say to ourselves, "Yes, I have had all this to deal with, and that is what I do, I deal with it. It's hard and yet I still get through somehow."
Some of you folks may suspect that I'm just cycling into a positive phase, and that's a concern. It feels different this time though, because I'm still getting all the triggers, and the symptoms are all still there, but I've been holding my ground for nearly a year. I'm beginning to think that I can do this.
Cheers, Myzen
