The more i think about next Thursday, i feel sick to my stomach, at times i cant believe its come to this. Like its happened, my nightmare has come true, and i blame you, but again not your fault. Its all this overwhelming emotion that has me wanting to secretly crawl into a cave, and not be in this world. My kids could come and go....but for the most part, i am isolated in my own place.
I wouldn't be surprised if i lose my job in the next 2 weeks. My son 13 year old, is so stressed he is having digestive issues and insomnia. Thinking of quitting my job to help him. My dad did actually tested positive for covid19. He has had a fever for 11 days. He says he gets a headache but no other symptoms. Nothing new with oldest son. I feel numb most often still. Though my frustrations are seeping through. School put out a survey about school experience so far, i filled it out completely strongly disagreed with everything, and included a paragraph of my son's experiences with online learning. Things like a teacher saying if i have to repeat myself again your losing 10 points?!? My son has a processing disorder u dumb **** !!! I said it without the dumb **** part though. Things like that are getting under my skin and i am letting it rip!! Physical pain isnt helping, some nights ok others i cant stand it. Tonight is okay, cant lay on my back...it hurts!