Yes, that's it. I always remember he had security. He had a nice bedroom, lots of clothes and got to go on school holidays - paid for by my father. My father gave the people looking after him money which meant I went without. I rarely got new clothes and never went on school holidays (not enough money). My brother visited us every day and knew who we were. He lived just 2 minutes walk away.
My parents were on their best behaviour when he visited.
He is 3 years younger and got to go to discos and stay out later than me.
He was in my opinion the apple of their eye. The child they wanted but for some reason couldn't have. It was actually better for him not to be brought up with his parents.
How bizarre is that?
And all the time he was resenting me for the time I spent with them.
I know I can't blame him for how I was treated as a child and vice versa, but how do you move past that?
When I was 16 I left home and moved in with my mother until I was 22 and got my own place.
When my brother was 17, my father helped him build a new house. And allowed him to move into it with his 15-year-old girlfriend. That relationship ended because he was abusive to her. He later attempted suicide because of the relationship ending. One of the reasons he stopped talking to our father was because the house developed lots of problems and he claimed our father's building company was a cowboy company.
However, the house still stands with new owners and has no problems.
I was driving a second-hand car and my brother's first car was brand new (he later crashed it into a tree).
I guess what I'm saying here is I went without so he could have things and this was due to my parents' guilt over the fact he was being brought up by different people.
So I saw how they were hurt by it and I saw that they felt bad about it and guilty and that they did love him. So I guess I don't think how he behaves towards them is right.
Both my parents are victims of their own childhoods too. I can forgive them because we have talked and they understand me and I understand them and they have apologised.
Why can't I forgive my brother? He isn't responsible for how I was treated by our parents? I'm not responsible for how he was treated by them? Am I blaming him in some way and what am I blaming him for? I just don't understand what the issue is between us. Is it really just resentment and jealousy?

Best case scenario would be to agree to disagree over our parents, but he won't even try to understand my point of view. I'm not forcing it on him, just asking him to understand me.

But I guess he does not want that. So I have to let him go. There is no way of improving this relationship. I was obviously a fool for giving him another chance after agreeing to talk to him after 6 years of silence. My partner actually said that I was at my happiest during the 6 years my brother wasn't talking to me.

I really see no way of repairing our relationship, but for my mother's sake, I will pretend everything is fine. I won't end the relationship. The door will always be open for him. I just won't make the effort anymore or have expectations for a lovely, close sibling relationship.

Our mother was in the hospital with sepsis the other week. She made a full recovery. I didn't bother telling him. I'm not going to feel guilty about that because he is capable of calling her and finding out for himself how she is. She is just as capable of telling him how she is. I think I've been the go-between for too long and need to get out of it. He asks me how she is and I tell her to call him. That stops now.

I don't hate him. I genuinely wish him well in his life, but I feel he resents me and always makes snarky abusive comments and never congratulates me on anything. He just isn't interested in my life at all.

Big thank you to you all for replying to me and helping me with this