1. If you really knew me, you'd know that I have to type in Times New Roman font, or else I feel like my writing is not aesthetically pleasing.
2. If you really, really knew me, you'd realize I am trying to take time to craft good responses on this website and in other places instead of knee-jerk reactions to things.
3. If you really, really, really knew me, you'd know that I have a profound sense of disillusionment with life right now, though at certain times it goes away and I can enjoy basic things.
4. Where do I go from here?
From here, I must carry on trying to become a better person according to my own standards. I must strive to create meaning in my life because it's not going to create itself. I need to figure out things from a medical point of view. I need to keep attending and actively participating in therapy.