I get the feelings your ex has been worked in his mind by negative situations. I would be the same, because women have done a lot of evil things towards me, but i am calm, relaxed and think of every person as different, both women and men of all ages.

You may need to support him and rescue him if possible. The death of anyone certainly to suicide or self harming is a problem. Just help as much as you can if possible. Just learn better for next time, and next sure it doesnt happen in your next relationship. All the best.