It may be worthwhile to ask them about their change in behaviours pre vs post fire. How did this fire impact all of you?

I'd also ask them why they feel it's important that you live at home until you're married. Is there a financial gain for them to have you live at home? Do they think you're incapable of living on your own? If so, why?

There seems to be a lot of unknowns here and I wouldn't bother guessing.

In terms of over-sharing, the operative word here is "over". It's one thing to share your life with someone, it's another to do so with too much details. It's lacking filters and a very selfish way of communicating.

When they talk about their lives, do you respond by talking about yourself? Do you enquire more about their thoughts and feelings about said scenario they shared with you?

How to stop? Find a balance. Try not to monopolize the conversations (not suggesting you are, btw) and ask more open ended questions about their experiences. Also, summarize your stories. Maybe script it out (mentally, even) ahead of time. What details can you omit?

If they used to listen to you and things have since changed, it sounds like the problem is coming from your end and they're not handling it very well. It might be a good question to ask them.

Talking to a therapist is different. They are being paid to listen to YOU and offer professional advice. Our family members and friends are not therapists. It's one thing to discuss with them about a hardship, it's another to develop a pattern around this. Again, balance.