Quote:
Originally Posted by Innerzone
I'm sorry things are going this way for you, Toughcooki.  I very much tend toward having acquaintances, not so much friends, so I know that no one really to call upon feeling. Do you happen to have the tendency to feel you're bothering people? This is a problem in my case, and I know it contributes to the issue. I'm trying. It's more challenging now with all that's going on, but I know there are meetup groups that are getting together online (zoom) and even some in person for hiking and such. Have you tried branching out to maybe find some new friends? The dynamic with the ones you mention is very unlikely to change. I don't know if it would help, but have you brought it up with them? |
Yes, I do feel like I'm bothering people - but it's a feeling that grows over the time that I know someone because when I ask for help, or try to express a feeling or whatever, they ACT like I'm bothering them, lol!
I haven't brought it up, no. I've only ever brought this issue up with one person, which was my dad. I actually asked if I had done something to inadvertently offend him at some time without knowing it, bc he's this super sweet jolly person with EVERYONE else in the world, including all his other kids, but with me he's distant and cold.... -He responded angrily that he's busy and has a life and can't be expected to be on call for my personal issues. So I gave up on him - haven't spoken to him in probably 5 years. Not out of anger, but out of neglect - I just am not willing to keep trying to shoulder the burden of a relationship neither of us wants. I never asked my mom why she didn't like me - she told me constantly growing up all the reasons I was unlikeable. Haven't spoken to her in 20 years - again, not out of anger, but self-preservation. *sigh*
