Hello purpleraven: I see this is your first post here on PC. Welcome to Psych Central.

The situation you are in is not one on which I can comment. However here are links to 4 articles, from Psych Central's archives, that may be of interest:

Why Your Asperger's-NT Relationship is Failing

Asperger's and Marriage: He's Always Looking for Debate

Shocked that Your Spouse Left? Here's the Secret to Recovery

When One Spouse Wants Out of the Marriage But the Other Doesn't

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.