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Nov 19, 2020, 08:31 AM
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Member Since: Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,008
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Originally Posted by MisterPaul
Firstly, "[...] We can't count on men" - that's a sexist comment, as if every single man out there is the same.
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I dont believe I said this. But that other person said because she sent pics it she should expect the guy to get a certain message. My point was men thinking that a woman dressing provocatively or engaging in a sexual situation and then saying no, or even sending pics should not lead to an expectation of having sex. Its the age old "she asked for it" because of how she dressed/pics she sent or being drunk around guys/ saying no after sex is initiated. The poor behavior of men is not her problem.
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Secondly, it's very sad that a person dealing with BPD does not control her actions but it's a cruel world. You still have to take resposbility for your actions. That guy didn't assault her, he was hitting on her, because she sent him the pics. A natural chain of events.
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Correct but I was responding to the person who asked her what she should expect? Of course he will be interested but "what does she expect" is a blanket statement that men make for justifying poor behavior.
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Thirdly, "How insensitive to people with bipolar. She does not control what he thinks or does" - that's a not an argument at all. What if she killed somebody because she does not control what she thinks? Dealing with any disorder on daily basis is a terrible thing but it's wise to point out "mistakes" like that and do one's absolute best to control or have influence on the similar situations' outcomes in the future.
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I fail to see how this mistake and a man getting an idea in his head and thinking its a done deal or invitation is the same as murder.
Maybe I chose the wrong sentence about self control and yes a Bipolar person has to take responsibility but since when is sending pics and someone getting the wrong idea her responsibility to manage a man's assumption?
And it was insensitive, maybe to to a person with bipolar but definitely to Aviza.
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