I think that is something I would state upfront, how unhelpful accusatory ''you'' statements are and how they are very untherapeutic. So maybe I would be ''too difficult'' ......

We pay these people who are supposed to, I thought, offer positive regard. And useful insights ... not name calling.

I do not think you're being sexist. I wonder why we are somehow ''trained'' to be ''passive'' and walk on eggshells?