“But inside you can feel it and you want to not be with this person.”
^
My answer was based on this part of the OP. When you said that line, I related to that feeling more than the feeling that you are also saying you can’t open up and be yourself. It’s more like I have ambivalent feeling about how I feel about them, but go along...for a while. My take on it is probably less healthy than the ‘you can’t be yourself’ with a romantic relationship. It’s dating someone though you have ambivalent feelings for them, but continuing anyway.