Quote:
Originally Posted by BethRags
For me, it's somewhat hard to separate living with BD and living through the pandemic. For example, I isolate a lot - but I'm not sure if that's me, or if it's covid.
I know we'll all feel a better sense of clarity when covid is at least under control.
Living one day at a time is a good idea, especially when you're newly diagnosed.
I can't recall - are you in therapy?
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Not anymore. Although I do talk to my nurse practitioner who I just found out was one. I thought she was a psychiatrist the entire time till she kept saying she needed to consult with her supervisor before changing my meds. I did have a counselor but I felt like I was repeating the same stuff every time we spoke so I felt like I could do that with family for free. I have a few family members and a couple of friends that I talk to regularly.
See today I was starting to think I could enjoy myself a little for Christmas, but it’s like these tiny sparks that are inside me. I don’t know if they will last because then the sadness takes over again. Especially thinking about having an illness. That’s the biggest one. I miss my life. I miss days when I was normal. One day I may get over it, but it’s going to take a long time. I just don’t want to be sick. I miss my sleep. I miss wanting to do crafts or photography. I miss wanting to do anything. Now all I crave is sleep. And my daughter is the only thing that brings me joy. Without her I would be void of anything.