I can have compassion for my parents.....at a distance. I had to go "no contact" in order to get perspective. They both had childhood trauma which i am absolutely sure contributed to how they treated me. That being said, I could no longer live with the toxic relationship. I haven't seen nor spoken to them since my grandmother passed away 2 years ago. Before that, I had little or no contact except to see my grandmother, who lived with them at the end. I don't regret it at all, though I often wish it weren't that way.