i think You need to ask Yourself what'd make YOU Happy, not other people. Is this what You wanted to do with Your own Life? Perhaps there are other Dreams You wanted to accomplish. Nevertheless, i am so Sorry things have been hard for You! Please do remember that, things accomplished or not, You're not a failure. Don't You EVER tell Yourself that. Please do not give up And try to examine Yourself And Your own Dreams. i know it's not easy since i can relate as i also feel the weight of other people's expectations on my shoulders. SEnding many Safe, warm hugs to BOTH You, @Diurnal, Your Family, Your FriEnds And ALL of Your Loved Ones! Keep fighting And keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!