Has your T mentioned how much progress you have made when you really do not see it?

Lately this has been a big issue with T and I. One example, last week we talked about a couple of difficult topics. At the end she said she was impressed that I was able to talk about both of them and stay present. She said it was a sign of real growth. When in reality I do not see it as growth but sliding backwards. For the first 8 years of therapy I never dissociated and never really avoided topics. I avoided feeling and could discuss anything. With long term T I only dissociated a couple of times near the end of our working together.

With current T I have dissociated quite a few times. Since I did not last week she sees it as huge progress. However the reality is the longer this pandemic goes on the less I can deal with emotions so I have put a wall up so I do not feel, like I did for most of my life. She says I can reach out to her between sessions but she hasnt been the greatest lately about responding, plus I am seeing signs that she is struggling, at least with anxiety. I dont know how to tell her all of this, nor am I sure I want to.