Hi everyone,

I am reaching out to see if someone can relate. My husband and I have been married for almost 11 years (known each other for for about 17). We have two young daughters - 7 and 5. Currently, we are on the brink of divorce. The divorce is something I am leaning towards - he is completely against that idea. The reason I want a divorce stems from my general unhappiness in the marriage. There has not been one major issue but many small things that cumulatively have resulted in the current situation. Primarily, I do not feel like he prioritizes me, he is not affectionate, he is controlling, he is not supportive of my mental health issues and we have very different values - he is very socially conservative and I am much more liberal. I also have my own faults which have contributed to where we are now. He's a good guy, but we are just not compatible, and although I care about him deeply, I am not in love with him anymore - there is zero emotional connection. I suffer from chronic depression which has put a strain on our relationship. He feels like my mental health issues have resulted in my having negative perceptions of our relationship which do not really exist. I feel like my mental health issues are exacerbated by our relationship problems and that I would be much less depressed if I was not in the relationship. At the moment I am in therapy twice a week for depression, self-harm and suicidal ideation. Has anyone been in a similar scenario? My other main concern has to do with our children. I know that the divorce will have a devastating impact on them. Since there is no infidelity or abuse in our marriage, do you think it would be worth sucking it up for the sake of the kids? I would live with the unhappiness and depression if it meant not permanently scarring them. P.S. We have been to marriage counseling a couple of times and it hasn't worked. Considering giving it a third try.
Thank you in advance for reading.