I hate myself so much. Finally get a job and I ruin it by snorting oxy before the drug test and before therapy. It was going to be 3 weeks clean tomorrow. I’m not even going to show up today. I have other crap to do anyways.
Lost power last night for five hours. I’m gonna go for a walk later check out the damage to the trails.
Getting back in touch with a (more than) friend too. He likes cooking for me but truth be told I’ve been trying to not feed my fat *** lately.

edit: Therapist explained why she thinks I have ADHD. Says I seem very back and forth and all over the place. Bouncing from topic to topic and really unable to focus for long. I’m going to ask to be tested next time I talk to pnurse.