This morning I was explaining something to someone that I felt might help that person see something in a different light.

Most people will hear this about horses in barn fires. It is said that often when rescuing a horse from a barn fire it's not just about getting them out to safety, but preventing that horse from running back into the burning barn. Many could never understand WHY any horse would choose to actually run back into a burning barn. Well, there is a reason for that. Horses begin to learn that their stall is "safe" and all living things including human beings tend to go to where ever they can feel safe. Horses are put in barns to get them out of the weather, to keep them safe from storms, from too much heat and bugs and the horse begins to learn that it's safe in a barn in a stall and they also get fed there too, so that's also a place where they are nourished. Often they can see other horses in the barn too, so that tends to be another comfort as they are herd animals.

So when a fire happens and there is chaos, and a horse is frightened, they tend to actually run back into that barn they identify as a place they are safe.

Human beings actually do the same thing. And a human being can develop habits that they deem safe when in reality it's just familiar and not really safe.

This habit of constantly blaming others when things go badly develops as a coping mechanism, and a person begins to use this method to escape problems. It becomes a place to run to when someone doesn't want to see that once again they ran into that burning barn. And if one thinks about the barn fire, the horse doesn't think, instead the horse "acts" on fear and impulse IN THE MOMENT. And if someone tries to help that horse, that person can actually get hurt when that horse is acting IN THE MOMENT and is driven to run back into that burning barn. Often a handler will grab something and cover a horse's eyes and leads them away from the trauma and that burning barn.

Ironically, this is something a person develops ways to do in order to get another person to think they are safe, to rescue them, to give them power or some kind of refuge. It's called getting another person to follow BLINDLY.

This technique is VERY MARKETABLE. In fact, when I look at my email I often see SEVERAL emails from someone claiming to be a psychic and tarot card reader. They all choose things that a person may be drawn to, it's their BAITING. A person is given some information that many people are challenged by, and in that information they are told how the psychic can't sleep and keeps getting dreams or messages about them they are compelled to share these messages. It even seems like "wow this psychic sees my challenge, it must be real". And the person ends up clicking on it, only to be told if they allow the psychic to share more, they will avoid certain doom or will read something important they can greatly benefit from. So because the person is struggling in some way, they agree and PAY THE FEE. And they THINK this person who is a so called psychic can really see and understand them. They don't realize this psychic has figured out how to get them to think that. After all this is how this so called psychic makes money. It's no different then doing a search and putting in what you are looking for and getting a list of what you are looking for and who you can buy it from.

The problem with constantly blaming others, is a person develops their own "cognitive distortions". They begin to create their own reality and avoid instead of learning and growing. The problem that develops from this is that the person gets so they don't know how to trust anyone or even themselves. It becomes a disorder and the person never really develops an identity as this disorder becomes their identity.