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Old Dec 02, 2020, 01:21 PM
FluffyDinosaur FluffyDinosaur is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2019
Location: In my head, mostly
Posts: 754
Quote:
Originally Posted by BethRags View Post
I'm not sure what to say, except that what you've described is exactly my experience. Word for word. I'm not agoraphobic, but leaving my apartment feels extremely unsteady because I have derealization (like I'm viewing the world through a fish tank). I also feel self-conscious about other people, because I feel so odd within myself...surely others will notice, or so it seems. The only place I feel truly safe is in my own environment, because I'm alone and everything is familiar. I also feel foolish and confused...like I might be walking outside and realize I've forgotten my shoes.

Time and place seems to be muddled...or unpredictable. Something like that.

To me, it feels like my brain is malfunctioning - which brings me back to the theory that BD is some type of seizure disorder, or something similar.

AP's don't really help. They might sometimes take the edge off, but it's not remarkable.
I wish I had a better answer for you. All I can say is that you certainly are not alone.
Thank you, that's good to hear. I've been feeling like I'm slowly going crazy. Unsteady is definitely another way to describe the feeling I have when I'm out "in the world." I also have issues being around people and keeping track of when/where I am. Part of it is that I'm just too tired to act normally around people anymore, and the other part is the confusion, the feeling that I'm acting strange, saying things I don't mean, my voice being all far away, and so on. It really does feel like a brain malfunction. I hope it clears up when the depression finally lifts a bit. I feel like people can see in my eyes from a mile away that there's something wrong with me.
Hugs from:
*Beth*, daladico, lightly toasted, Rick7892, wolftrap
Thanks for this!
lightly toasted