I'm still absolutely gutted about the match results. I know I'll get good training and it's plenty prestigious but I had really decided I wanted my first choice for a boatload of legitimately good reasons and the thought of moving across the country sounds just awful.

I'm trying to get excited about warm weather and surfing and the legitimately amazing faculty there but I think I need to wallow a bit more before I'm ready for that.

T ended up getting back to me via text. (I never text him unless I need immediate help but in the chaos of finding out I texted instead of emailed.) He said, among other things, "I think the hard thing is that we have a very strong relationship, and it genuinely feels like we are “in the middle” of something together—Not just getting started, and definitely not naturally winding down. It feels very odd to think about having to interrupt that; it is almost hard to fathom."

Geneticist guy still wants to see me again (though I can't imagine why--who would want to date someone who's moving across the country in seven months?) but virologist guy fell off the face of the earth. Just as well.

I wonder if I'm going to stay in bed for the next month. Very well might.