Today my therapist tested me on how much I lose focus and other things that are impacting me dissociation. I was hopeful to start EMDR, however she just told me she has to review the answers to the questions she asked me today. Also she told me we both have to make sure that any trauma work has to be done slowly.

I left the session confused and felt that she might abandon me because of how much in my life im not able to focus on the here and now. I have never ever been this open with a therapist or was ever allowed to explore why im losing focus. I have allot of shame and embarrassment from not knowing for a long time what was happening. I have lost friendships, family have become very distant in my life. I don't know if what im feeling is normal.