I found a new T. The first two sessions went quite well, I was emotional in both and cried a little, which felt like a real release. The T asked a few odd questions, but I generally felt that I liked her. The T set me some homework in the second session, she suggested I journal (which I do anyway), and also that I write a letter to my mum. I was ambivalent about doing this, and also about being given homework, though I agreed to it. I started the letter, but didn’t finish it. Before the session I prepared some emotional stuff that I wanted to talk about. At the start of the session the T asked me about the homework, I told her I’d started it, I didn’t want to tell her that I was ambivalent about being given homework, as I didn’t want any conflict when I’ve just seeing her,, when I don’t really know her. She asked me persistent questions about it, and said: ‘ I need to know how you feel about it’. I ended up saying something about power in the therapeutic relationship, which she didn’t respond to. After about 10-15 minutes of talking about it she again said I need to know how you feel, I said I feel that you are directing the session, there are other things that I want to talk about. The T said: ‘ you need to think about whether I’m the right T for you’. This shocked me, as I felt we were just getting to know each other, and I expect that we would be able to have discussions about how we will work together. The T said, I’m not directing, I’m a non directive therapist, you don’t have to answer the questions I answer (if I could go back in time I would have said ‘it’s hard not to answer a question when you start it with It ‘I need to know’.. She also said that she had asked about the homework for continuity with the last session as this had been an important thing from the last session. If I could go back, I’d point out that this was what was important to her from the last session, but not what was important to me, what was important to me was the emotional side to it. She made this all into a huge issue, and we carried on talking about it, to my frustration. After 40 minutes of a conversation about this there was a lull and an opportunity for me to talk about what I wanted to, but it felt hard to, which I voiced and we talked a bit more about the questions she’d asked me. At the 50 minute mark I started telling her about the emotional stuff I wanted to talk about, and the T said, we can have a longer session today if you want (I don’t know if she was feeling remorse and suddenly felt that she had, after all, been leading the session), I said I’d rather stick to the hour. Afterwards I emailed her to say that I wasn’t going to continue. She replied: ‘I understand’. I wonder what on earth her understanding of the session was. I had such high hopes as I really liked her website. That was a waste of time and money.