Quote:
Originally Posted by nottrustin
Thank you Manatee. I am so used distracting because this how I naturally survived for many years as well as shutting down emotionally. Both are my natural default. So what I struggle with is the idea that I am not supposed to do these things that have worked for so many years. In order for me to heal from trauma I need to learn emotional regulation....BUT as soon as I start feeling emotions and unable to handle it, I am told to distract. UGH..
|
I think it's just a really, really slow process. You start to feel your emotions just a little bit, you figure out how to manage them, feel them, let them rise and then fall again. Then the next time you can handle those emotions just a little bit more. Feel the distress, tolerate it, build confidence that you can handle it, come back down from the bad feelings. It's slooow. Probably years for a lot of people.
And in between these sessions of facing the pain and distress, you need to do something to keep yourself from diving into too much too soon and getting overwhelmed, so distraction is a great option (probably better than, say, drinking too much or other less healthy options). You have to be able to also live your life while you undergo this long, slow, painful process, so some amount of distraction can be useful to help you do that. It's a both/and thing.