I've gone manic three times. All three times I was 100% certain I was connected to God. (I was raised without organized religion.) All three times I ended up in handcuffs and taken to a psychiatric institute.

I will always believe I was with God, because I believe we are always with God, and God is always with/within us. When manic, for me, it's an ego-death, which is why I feel God. Without the ego, I am One with the soul/God.

Now that I'm stable, I want to connect with God without the mania and the psych ward. Sometimes when I'm naturally happy, I get anxiety - as I connect happiness with God, then I connect God with getting locked up.

Anyone else struggle with this?

Davis