Oh man I totally get where you’re coming from. I’m not healed myself from my last psychotic episode in august/September this year. I did some incredibly stupid things...at work. I had a brutal public execution. It’s slowly getting better day by day but there’s certain people at work I can barely make eye contact with yet alone speak to. Sigh. I’m just hoping with time next year I’ll rebuild my confidence and get back to my “old normal “ reputation. It’s not easy and it’s going to require small steps like me making more eye contact and begging small conversations with people who know I went totally off the rail.