That is amazing news about the assistant principal!!!! Thank Goodness!!! I could definitely see how that was a trigger!!! Good riddance!! I have no idea how people like that are able to sneak into the school system. We had a guy teacher here my first year who was sleeping with students and giving them better grades!!! He got busted because a friend of mine found out and reported him. She ended up getting transferred to another school because they wanted it to be silent about what happened. The guy ended up getting 10 years in prison, they had video proof from his computer!!

I think one of my triggers was finding out my cousin was raising new daughter, his first child. He was the on responsible for the abuse when we were kids. I reported him to CPS and had an anxiety attack afterwards.... I still don’t know what all triggered me, I think it was a combination of things.

Oh wow so we are the same age and have kids the same age?!! Crazy... in a good way! 😊
I had my 21 year old without the dad in the picture... my husband helped me raise her starting at the age of 11. He has 2 kids that I helped raise, one is now 23 and the other is 18. Then we both have a 2 year daughter together. So the marriage ended because of BP? I stopped my divorce when I started to get depressed and I tried to get back with my husband. He seemed excited at first, then hesitant, then sure he was and we started wearing our rings again. I partially moved into his apartment, but then he started acting different. We’ve had a couple of talks. He said he is cold to me, not sure if he will warm back up. He doesn’t know where he stands. It’s been tough because I thought I didn’t love him, but now I keep thinking of everything he ever did for me and how much he really loved me. Now I think I just blew it. I don’t know if he will ever love me like he used to....

Is your partner accepting of the illness? Did you tell him upfront about it? I feel like if I get a divorce I don’t want to be with anyone ever again. I just don’t want to put this burden on anyone. When I was in the process of getting a divorce I started talking to an old friend. I really thought I was done with my husband and I started to see a future with my friend. He lives in California so I never met up with him. I feel so terrible now because I was talking to him while I was married (my husband found out about it) and I feel like I led my friend on thinking I was this super happy and confident person. I stopped talking to him when I got depressed. I felt like he was this fantasy and it wasn’t really what I needed. I also felt like my friend deserved to be with someone who didn’t have a mental illness. So that’s where I am now, I really don’t want to put my disorder on anyone. The only guy I thought might love me no matter what was my husband and now he doesn’t seem to care anymore. I try not to let it bring me down... I’m already down. This is my first episode of mania and then depression... my mania lasted about 3 months and so far the depression has lasted about 5 1/2 months.

Hmmm about the other AP, I would just leave it alone. I mean you could get him a card and chocolates but it might bring it back up again and he’ll know you are thinking about it... idk, depends on how he thinks I guess. Me I would just pretend it didn’t happen and try to move on. But if you need closure to help you then you could.

So you guys are still having get togethers and teachers can meet at a pub? There is no pub gatherings here for teachers and they cancelled all parties due to Covid. How was the gathering? Did you enjoy it?

Crazy thing is I didn’t get a lot of sleep while manic but I did when I guess I was in hypomania but as soon as the depression hit I got 1 hour of sleep. It’s been terrible since July. The drs though I was going manic at first but nope. Apparently I’m one of those that get little sleep in either side of the spectrum. There’s been a couple of nights that I never slept! I’m lucky if I get 5 hours. I got at least 4 1/2 last night.

I’m on lithium, I’m talking to a dr next week. Maybe they will want to change the mood stabilizer... I’ll ask them about that one.

It’s so strange that so many of us have delusions about God. When I went to the hospital there was a lady there that told me the thunder storm was really a fight between angels and demons. It freaked me out, even though I had been going through psychosis myself lol! Oh I tweeted 700 tweets in one week. I haven’t even gone back to read them. Mind you all of my school and school district could see what I was tweeting...

Thank you... yes depression sucks!! I never understood it before when I saw people go through it. I though they could will themselves out of it. Boy was I ever wrong!! I used to enjoy buying gifts and going shopping so I’m hoping that it will help me a little. I definitely don’t like it right now.

I struggled on my daughters 2nd birthday too! I had just became depressed. I didn’t even buy her a gift. My husband bought the cake and food and gifts and we celebrated at my moms house. I just sat there and after everyone left I broke down in tears. The year before had been so different. I painted, created a photo backdrop for her pictures, took pics of her in strawberries in milk, created thank you cards, decorated, and had the house full with guests, food, and laughs...... I just feel like I’m never going to be the best mom again. I’ll never be able to give her what I did for my 21 year old daughter....

Those are all real fears.... hopefully your daughter doesn’t leave!! I would flip out if my 21 year old did. I make her come see me as much as possible. It was breaking my heart when I knew she would move out and leave one day. It’s why I really wanted to have another child. I love being a mom....

Haha well I was expanding my circle of friends while I was manic. I contacted almost everyone on Facebook.... old friends, new friends, friends in the hospital..... now, no one calls me. Not even my husband texts me back anymore. I sent him a nice message this morning and he’s silent. I have to reach out to people and I’m not always good at that especially if they don’t respond.

When is your birthday? Mine is 6/6

I have no clue what all I will do over the break. I just know shopping is one thing. Probably watch more tv. And avoid dealing with my house. My husband doesn’t want to move back to it so I’m either going to sell it or keep it if he doesn’t start loving me again.... I just really don’t want to separate because one I love him and two I don’t want to be away from our 2 year old. She’s the only thing that brings me pure happiness and helps me feel better.

Have a good night!