I still feel ill and disgusting after a binge eating session.......I got rejected by a fella on a dating site.....was prevented from visiting my mum in her care home,I had a visit booked today but they cancelled it cos two staff members of the care home tested positive for covid...........I also feel so ill from high sugars that I am unable to attend for a blood test tomorrow.I think I will be well enough for the trip to the cinema with my niece and the meal at the restaurant after...hope the restaurant isn't too busy with long queues to get in.I am ok cos I know if I stay off the sugar and eat healthy I will lose weight and my health will improve especially if I exercise regular too,at this time my eyes are damaged from diabetes,I have high cholestrol,high blood pressure,hypothyroidism,diabetes and am obese and so cannot walk far as I am so heavy.....I am also ugly and really unfit,so not a desirable match for anyone.But I can change that.

I keep telling myself that God has given me all the knowledge and skills to get over these eating disorder behaviours and sugar addictions.I just have to abstain and quit sugar,beat the addiction work on my fears,shame and guilt improve my self esteem and confidence and acknowledge and heal the wounds of abuse from living for years with an abusive narcissistic family.Easy isn't it?Not,but doeable,yes!