Dear fer111,
I am so very sorry you have these sleep difficulties. How awful. I have been afflicted with terrible sleep problems and have been on many sleep medications and am now on one called Trazadone. It seems to help me a lot. This is NOT advice for you though. I am not a doctor or medical professional and cannot give advice that you or anyone could or should rely upon. Hopefully you and your doctor will be able to find something that works for you. Sleep problems can be so horrible, draining and demoralizing.
Hopefully others here will have better words for you than my poor words!
Sincerely yours, Yao Wen