Hi,

I am so sorry for your pain and for what you're going through.

It seems that your husband has conflicted feelings about the divorce, despite still wanting one. It is very natural to have conflicted feelings, which shows he must still care for you on some level or even love you still.

My advice would be to try and accept his decision, as hard and as painful as that can be.

When two people grow apart and begin living as roommates when it is a marriage, the marriage must have at some point gone off track. Thinking back on your years together and the most recent years, do you feel you have grown apart? Keeping a marriage together takes effort and work, especially as the years go on. Did the romance disappear? Did sex disappear? Were you two living separate lives after a while, with separate interests, friends and activities? Think back on it - you don't have to answer me. I am just probing to see your perspective on where things may have started to unravel and to discover for yourself at which point did you start living as roommates, as he says.

I, too, am going through a divorce right now. It's not fun and it's not easy whatsoever, so I feel for you.