Felling pretty lonely and bad right now. After a year of not seeing any family, I finally managed to travel to my native country (in Europe) and see them. I had a test, was very careful, so I was pretty confident that it would be ok. I was supposed to stay there until after Christmas and then return home to the UK. But the day after I got there, Boris announced this tier 4 business and lots of European countries closed their borders to arrivals from the UK. I had to make a choice: change my flight and leave while I still could, or risk being stuck there for who knows how long. I looked into repatriation flights, but il all seemed so complicated and dependent on the number of UK nationals. So I made the difficult decision of coming back to the UK after spending less than 48 hours with them. I don't have a job where I can work from home and I've run out of annual leave so I needed to be back at work in early January.

I just feel like such a horrible person to have made this choice. I have my difficulties with my family but I wanted to spend time with them and I love them. Maybe I should have chanced it and hoped I could have returned after Christmas....I just don't know if I made the right decision. I feel so guilty and horrible. Wish I could talk to T about it but he's on holiday until Jan. Definitelt an awful Christmas this year.