I haven't had any nice euphoric hypomania this year either but i feel it's due to COVID. There's nothing to get excited about and no way to have any adventures. I got "boosts" in the Spring and Fall but they were brief. In the Spring i cleaned and in the Fall i cooked. Otherwise i've been mildly to moderately depressed. I really resonated with the words of @lightly toasted. Thirty years after diagnosis i'm still having mood swings. Ditto the yummy junk food and binge-watching and sleeping well. And with suicidality being infrequent instead of constant. We're really on the same page.

Tomorrow is my Scrabble club's Christmas party on ZOOM while we have our regular club night. I should go in the party because my days are dull but i'd have to take a shower and dress and i'm ashamed of how much weight i've gained since COVID. I hope i can make it. I'll for sure play the games, i just might not go in the party. I'm on a winning streak at Scrabble club. I've won all my games three weeks in a row.

Last night i was awake til 4:00am but i've been getting up later and later in the afternoon and resting part of the afternoon also so i'm getting hardly any daylight. This is about usual for this time of year. I dread Christmas and just focus on passing the time in as pleasant a way as possible. I had some fun games tonight in Scrabble. I just play the dumbest bots i can find, so i'm almost assured to win. I don't like losing. It's amusing to play this way, just the same.

Hugs to all who struggle!