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Old Dec 24, 2020, 02:39 PM
Anonymous49105
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I'm sorry.

Could it be that she seems more appealing now that she's with someone else? Its a very common phenomenon. Regardless, I'm sorry your heart is broken.

From what you wrote, it sounds like she treated you poorly. You deserve better in your life.

"How do I move on from something I miss so bad?"

1.) This will take time, but time does heal.

2.) Consider that if someone doesn't want to be with us, its not always a reflection of us, but of them. When someone is in our lives for a season, even a long season, when they leave, it hurts. Its painful even physically. You may be going through withdrawal. Also consider that ppl who can't see our value and reject us, aren't worth our time of day, despite the time of day we give them in our heads!

3.) Check out the book Emotional First Aid by Guy Winch. There's a whole chapter in it about rejection and how to heal from it. There's also a chapter on rumination you may want to look into.

4.) Be around other people. Get out if your head and connect with your friends and family. If you don't have any, consider making some. It can really help to have a support network. Post here, if it helps. There's lots of good support you can find here from others. Welcome to My Support Forums, btw!

5.) This situation, while painful, could be a time of immense positive transformation for you. I don't think anything brings about positive change and growth in a person quite like devastation and a broken heart.

6.) Unfriend her on facebook. You don't need to see that crap. Tell your friends you don't want to hear about her and him. Imo, friends who tell their heartbroken friend details like this aren't good friends. Unless you asked. Stop asking. Live YOUR life, and slowly learn to live without this individual. Try to stop obsessing about this individual. Just Google "how to stop ruminating." You will come up with a lot of help.

7.) Focus on being a good father.

8.) Do you have hobbies or things that bring you joy? Do them. If not, set out to discover what makes you happy.

9.) You may be being given a gift. You are being given a new life despite not wanting it or having asked for it. Consider that maybe this is a blessing in disguise.

10.) I'm not saying "get over this right now." You may still need to grieve. But there's a lot you can do to "move on," too.

11.) Consider seeing a therapist who can also help.
Hugs from:
Bill3
Thanks for this!
Bill3, Open Eyes, RoxanneToto, UncertainFuture