One of my close girlfriends says I am just as responsible for allowing the abuse.

I feel very victim blamed!

I see my mistakes and fault in all of this -- but to say that I allowed this? I take umbrage to that. She is one to beat herself up more than I do in life - she is beating herself up right now for not living up to her own expectations of herself in life.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

I need my friends, but sometimes I don't feel like processing this with them anymore.