I’m going to talk to my case manager tomorrow. I’ve been very honest with her since meeting with her. Maybe I need to go up to PHP instead of IOP. I wish I could get ahold of my Pdoc. He said he’d call earlier this week. My appointment was cancelled without them telling me and he never called for the reschedule. I swear if my Geodon was raised to 100 at night instead of 80 and my lamictal was raised to 225 instead of 200 I’d feel so much better and it wouldn’t affect my weight either.

I told my mom what happened and then gave her all my meds. Including my Tylenol. She is in complete control now of everything. And the cough syrup and melatonin have been hidden for weeks.

This is why I went through a massive amount of pain instead of using a lot of opiates after my surgery. An opiate addiction is the absolute last thing I need.

I appreciate your support and concern. A lot.

I feel really sick right now. I think I need to lie down.