Dear T,
I just read something where Fauci speculated that we might be essentially back to normal, if enough people get vaccinated, by the end of next year. The end of next year? So another whole year of this? I just feel so hopeless...


And I wonder, because you seem particularly worried about the virus...will you not let clients come back until they're vaccinated? Which would mean...I know you have some young adult clients, so they'd be likely eligible before me. And if you have an elderly ones. Or, obviously, front-line workers. Or those with health conditions. Based on a questionnaire I did, I'm essentially at the end of the line in terms of eligibility. Will you let everyone else in first, assuming that maybe you could get one earlier as a healthcare provider (though not frontline, like in a hospital, of course, but still maybe under "essential")? Will you wait to let everyone in at once? Or will the others get to go before me?


Also, will you be willing to travel for pleasure before seeing clients in person? I know that could be a case of trying to protect your clients. But if that happened, if you took a vacation that involved air travel, heading to a fairly populated area (vs. a car drive to a cabin in the woods), yet wouldn't see clients in person...that would be really painful for me. (And I also wonder how long insurance will be willing to reimburse at the current rate for teletherapy. What if they stop that? But you won't see clients in person?)

I feel like I can't ask you any of these questions tomorrow, because you probably won't know the answers yet. I mean, maybe you could at least say whether you'd wait till you were willing to allow all clients in person vs. being selective on who had vaccine. Or that maybe you'd allow, say, a couple a day, spaced out, like maybe each client could come in person once or twice a month or something.

But then I also wonder--what if you start seeing clients in person, but would require masks. Could I still keep seeing you virtually, because I'd rather that way vs. with us both wearing a mask? (And will insurance still partially reimburse then?)

This is all stuff I'm thinking about...Along with the lack hope. I know there are certain reasons to feel hopeful for the new year. But I'm struggling with it. And I'm sort of worried about how I'll do between when I see you on Wednesday and then the following Monday. Christmas was OK. But New Year's tends to give me more issues and lead to more dark thoughts in general. So I hate that I can't even really contact you, aside from emergency (if I understood/read between the lines correctly) between after session Wed. and either Sunday (if you're working then) or Monday morning. I suppose I could clarify tomorrow? (And I'm very grateful that you're working tomorrow through Wed. next week, instead of being off for like 12 days striaght).

Love,
LT