I think that we see things more as we are exposed to different behaviors in others. We don't always see things right away so we may not react where we have the self assurance when we come across different behaviors.

Given what I have learned, I can see how an alcoholic develops ways of behaving that are very unhealthy and how others may not pick up on it even when I can see the obvious red flags. It can be a challenge to see how a person twists things around to gain support that empowers that person in some very unhealthy ways.

There are individuals that make impulsive choices not paying attention to the red flags that will have consequences. Then because they acted on impulse and ARE paying the consequences, they become that constant victim when in reality the consequences were right in front of that person the entire time.

Sometimes there are problems in other people that one never really handles all that well because of how the other person tends to distort reality and the only reality that matters is their own. Truth is, people are often a lot more complex than we realize and we all can have problems seeing things in the moment or when someone is using behavior patterns they found works for getting the attention they desire.

Last night I saw a documentary about the man who murdered Versace. Versace was such a gifted man and worked very hard to attain his standing and success. Unfortunately, it was his standing and success that became the cause of him losing his life. It was because of someone who never got that kind of success and grew mad with jealousy to the point where he went on a murdering spree where he murdered those who had gained the success he himself could never gain. Versace believed he was safest here in the US and where he built his beautiful home in Florida. Well, he did not know someone was watching and saw his pattern to see when he would be vulnerable. We all are vulnerable and anyone can come along and take us by surprise.