@Alive99, how are you doing now with all of this? Where are you at in your thought process and emotional state?

I am not sure if I posted this here yet, but I formally reached out to two abusive ex's to tell them I forgive them. It has been several years of no contact. Now, this may not have been the best idea given how they may react to this, especially out of the blue years later, but I did it for myself. And I do feel better after having done so.

I am not suggesting you do the same thing. I am only sharing this because I finally got to a place of being sick and tired of holding onto the pain that one of these individuals in particular caused. I wanted to finally let it go.

But forgiveness is tricky business. I think one has to process the experience for oneself first, and process through all the resulting emotions before being able to forgive, in one's heart or formally in an email like I did. If we forgive too quickly, we may still have to process what happened, regardless.

But forgiving for me has finally allowed me to release all the pain, anguish and regret that they caused me, and I do feel a lot lighter, better and more at peace about these situations that happened in my life.

Anyways, just wondering how you're doing with all of this and where you're at personally with it all. Hugs to you.