I hate the feeling of not being okay but being okay enough to not be in crisis. I think that is where I am at today. I haven't taken any anxiety medications, which might actually help but I've taken them two days in a row so I am trying not to today. It's times like these where I wish I could email current T but she doesn't do emails only texts or phone calls. It isn't something I think I can verbalize but maybe I can write it out and then shorten it to text length.


I'm still feeling sort of self destructive but not as much as yesterday and the hallucinations/delusions seem to be gone. I talked a lot to my pastor's wife and that helped.