There is so much about your post that is stomach-churning and frankly I see why she is not enthused. You have some issues that I think you need to see an individual counselor about. One of the issues is whether you two are even compatible. You honestly sound like a child about sex ("I'm gonna be grumpy") like really dude? Take care of yourself, don't put your mood off on your spouse.

I can't believe you threatened to call the cops because she wanted to visit her friend. You sound controlling and frankly, your whole post sounds like there is seething anger just below the your surface.