Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966
It’s important to address the past, but then it’s important to attempt to improve your present. When all people do is agonize over what happened all while their present life is in shambles, then they are not learning any lessons at all.
In addition some people like to be stuck in their childhood because it’s easier, it absolves them from responsibility. If they see themselves as crying babies instead of capable grown ups well into adulthood and often old age, then they don’t have to take charge in any fields of their lives. Don’t have to take care of anything. Someone else will take care of things: parents, spouse, siblings, charities, government. Growing up requires learning life lessons, addressing the past but taking charge of one’s present life. It could be scary.
Being stuck in the past must be emotionally draining but it’s easier way to live because you can stay passive and disengaged all while others take care of you. Miserable life if you ask me.
Having said that, if people feel stuck in the past they might need to seek help. Like looking for a good therapist. It could be too hard to get unstuck without help. But seeking help again requires taking charge of one’s life
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Yep makes sense. I agree, being stuck in the past and having others take care of you so you don't have to take responsibility has to be a miserable way to live. Then you're not independent and also may be seen as unreliable in other people's eyes. Yeah there are some people who can't seem to free themselves from the past and a therapist would need to guide them in some way. I agree that addressing the past in moderation is okay, I do that myself, but there is definitely a difference between taking lessons learned from the past and non-stop rumination to the point where you basically can't live or can't be independent.