Divine - yeah cuz i was thinking, re-pairing, as in a parent reflects the childs emotions, its how the child learns to understand himself and life. If they didnt have that pairing in childhood. It left me VERY deficient socially, psychologically, emotionally. I mean i realize i turned out exactly like my mother, but that isnt much consolation. Its more the belated realization that ugh just kills you.

So - people on weightwatchers were saying, whats the word for 2021. Mine is still gonna be, take responsibility. Thats the only way to make up for the past and not create any more crummy future? I guess thats like AA's step 9, make amends. But i feel like most of my amends are still pretty self-centered.

Eta - i started t in my early 20's - i didnt want to TOUCH reparenting. Parents were a dirty word! So for me to even consider it was a big leap.