Staying for the children is pretty much ensuring that your kids will go for exact same bad relationships as you, if all they see is bad marriage it’s their normal. Pretty much it’s a guarantee they’ll need years of therapy to undo the damage of witnessing your bad marriage. And kids always always know what’s going on. Sure it’s not that bad you said, but controlling and not affectionate is a bad choice of a husband in my books

Divorce could be devastating for the kids or might be not. It depends how you handle it. But witnessing marriage where a man (or a woman) is controlling, unsupportive and not affectionate will sure devastate them in a long run because that is exactly who they choose for themselves. Consciously or subconsciously

Now sure living apart or being single is financially more difficult than relying on a partner. Usually it’s harder. But it’s more than doable. Ton of people are single with kids or without and they have great life and give great life to their children. Plenty of women have great lives and they don’t have a man. In addition, there is more to life than money.

Continue with therapy. Consult with a therapist. Work on your own mental health

Sure some people choose life of unhappiness. Some live their whole life like this. And find themselves in old age in misery and life in shambles and wasted. I’d never advice such a life to anyone. Having said that, it’s wise not to rush and think it through with a skilled therapist