As about abuse forum and people shaming you, sadly some people just must tears others down. Plus some people project, big time.

There are women and men who can’t handle when others are being strong and gearing towards better life. Because too many endured life of abuse, infidelity and other poor treatment, they can’t handle it if others make a break through. They want them to be weak and incapable of change

They’ll go to great length with their advice to make sure others follow their lead and stick around abusers or continue life of misery. They just can’t handle it knowing that other people lead a better life.

I bet some of them even advice others to stay with abusers and cheaters because they did and now feel jealous others might actually have brighter future ahead. They hope by shaming you for reacting they’ll beat you down and you’d be just as miserable as them or maybe even stay with abusers.

I find it despicable but that’s a sad reality. Having said that, of course there are ton of truly supportive people and forums. One thing to suggest you try to not react (the way some of us did) and the other is to shame you for reaction to abuse.