Sending you many hugs.

I admire your strength, yes it takes strength to take steps to better and happier life. I am not surprised you have PTSD, infidelity is a major betrayal especially if it’s repeated multiple times (sadly sometimes people don’t know if it was multiple times assuming it never happened more than once, when in reality sometimes cheaters just learn to hide better, it’s better to know for your own protection). I suggest when you are ready, seek therapy to help you through difficult emotional challenges and rebuild your strength ( I forgot if you mentioned seeing a therapist)

His mental health cannot be your priority in life. Your life can’t be about him. You have your own life and your children to worry about.

Especially if he has other women, you cannot be expected to be his punching bag and make your life about him and his mental health. I admire you staying decent and respectful, it’s the best way to end one’s marriage especially when children are involved, but I agree there is no need to look for excuses and no need in losing your own value in the process.

I also noticed that you said you see clearer now what you need and what you deserve. That’s a major break through. I strongly suspect that what you need and deserve doesn’t include disrespectful and unfaithful men.

Having said that, I hope you two will have reasonable co parenting schedule and he remains actively involved in children’s life (regardless if you decide on 50/50 or you’ll have primary custody and he’ll have visitations). It could be done with children’s interest in mind.

You sound like a wonderful wise person. I have a feeling you’ll have a great life ahead of you. I am here for you. Hugs