@Catgotmytongue,

I agree with you - there's several boxes to check off before someone can truly be identified or labeled as a narcissist. As far as I understand it, narcissism exists on a spectrum, but to be diagnosed as NPD, someone needs to meet very specific criteria. I think we all have narcissistic tendencies, and you're right - the label is slapped on very readily and carelessly a lot on social media.

I was simply sharing something I learned from a podcast that I thought was very interesting. The one question may not be enough to truly identify narcissism, but if someone says they have nothing to work on within themselves, that to me would be a tip off that the person has no ability to introspect, has no interest in growing as a person, doesn't feel they need to improve anything about themselves and is not very self aware.

For me personally, I would be very turned off by such a person and wouldn't want to date them. I am personally very into introspection, self awareness,, self improvement and self development. I have been in therapy most of my life. I try to learn from my mistakes, and I try to improve myself as a person constantly.

My husband, for example, is a narcissist and feels he does nothing wrong. He is never wrong, and I am the one who always misinterprets or misunderstands him. He can do no wrong, and he has no real reason to go to therapy. He is extremely abusive as well and won't acknowledge at this point that he's been abusive in our marriage. Back in July when I faced him with a divorce then, he did acknowledge and admit to his abuse towards me. But he only just paid lip service to the abuse back then. He didn't REALLY mean it and he has completely backtracked saying now that our arguments were just normal arguments that occur between husband and wife, when in reality, he used to explode on me frequently in angry and abusive rages over nothing.

He only claims he will go to therapy now to salvage our marriage - but deep down, he doesn't feel he needs to change anything about how he behaves within a relationship. Now that is a classic NPD trait. So is lack of empathy, entitlement, and a superior attitude, all of which my husband exhibits.

If I asked him this one question posed in the podcast, I am sure he would say "I don't need or or want to change anything about myself. I am fine just as I am".

We all have something or many things we can improve about ourselves. I now am very wary of anyone who claims they have nothing to work on. So that's why I thought it was an interesting question to pose to someone.