Silent scream

I try so hard to fight this urge
day and night this mind of mine to purge
lustful thoughts of what is not in my hand
how much longer will I be able to stand
put up with this torture inside my soul
living a lie... playing a role
one part of me hates the other
in constant search of a moment to attack and smother
my heart is being ripped out of its place every single day
hit and crushed into tiny pieces of fragile clay

in hiding...