I found out in the summer of 2019 that my husband of 8 years was a sex addict. He had been cheating on me for most of the marriage. Shortly after this revelation, I realized I was pregnant with our 2nd child. Since then, we have been doing an "in home" separation. We are both seeing counselors, did couple therapy, and he has been very dedicated to his recovery. He checks in with his sponsor and does step work fairly regularly.
Prior to him facing his addiction, our marriage was crumbling. In addition to infidelity, he was very controlling and emotionally abusive. Our marriage was pretty crappy before I knew about his infidelities.

Since facing his addiction, he has become an amazing husband and father. He is finally attentive, caring, and has empathy. I wanted so much for the sake of our family for me to fall back into love. I mean, he finally became the man I wanted. Shouldn't this erase past trauma?

After discussing divorce in my counseling sessions for years, I keep coming to the conclusion that the only way for me to move on is divorce. I have not had romantic feelings towards my husband in years. I kept verbalizing its what I need, and sometimes look forward to divorce.

I asked my husband for a divorce. He has secured an attorney. I however, don't feel confident about moving on (even though I want it). He's become a great friend. He actually takes care of me now. What if Im making a mistake? What if I stick it out longer- maybe Ill fall back in love? I m also scared of being alone and not seeing my kids everyday.

I have been in this constant state of mental turmoil since July 2019. Despite talking to friends and therapists, I cannot move on. I keep making decisions, then second guessing them. Is this normal? How do I know when I am ready for a divorce?

Thank you to those that read this long post